Everything that has happened to me would have given me reason to be..less happier? Angry? Sad? All I know is that it has made me feel loved. Strong. Happy. Privileged.
But every now and again real life rears it head. And then even I get a off day. Case and point today. Wow.. and was it bad.
Now I do not work in the most perceptive office. They wouldn't recognise my face from sad to happy. And I am 100% with that (who wants people who don't care about you to ask!). But wow. Even I was surprised to cry (shed 10 tears) at work, and generally being not me going so completely unnoticed. Makes me sure of my decision to break bands with the company. But I'll do a "work life" post. I love, LOVE my job. I love my manager. I love the people who work for me. My office life is OK on a best day. Long story. Different post.
So my dad has had a rough time. Me living with them at the moment gives me front row seats. I watched when he fell in the hospital. I was with him when he gets up and is so dizzy he can't walk. I was with them when they heard he has to see a doctor with regards to bad news.
Add to all this a divorce being finalised.
Yes. I am allowed a bad day. Everyone is.
And you. You who have an excuse for everything? Who gets to the office and your first words are "I'm so tired". Let me tell you how I feel secretly. F.U.C.K. you. If I can smile. If I can love my whole life with all the bad days, and the good, if I can love my job (full time) and have three kids as just me. And wake up with a smile. Then yes. Do. Not. Tell. Me. You. Are. Tired.
This was a vent. Because really, if I can't vent on my own blog. Then where can I?
And.. :)
Our life this last while.. or some of it anyway. Way too much happened for one post.
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