The sad post..

I've been avoiding doing this update.. I'm just not good at blogging when too sad, or too angry. Whatever I type when in one of these moods normally end up in my drafts to be reconsidered and reread the  next day.

I'll go for the straight answer, and also do this in everyday life. Everyone that I am close with know all the details, the rest work on the principal: You ask, I tell.

Ok, so after that paragraph of delay. The dad of my three died this weekend in a car crash. We don't know much of the accident, other than the fact that he rolled the car on his way back from a site visit and died hours later. We are still trying to get him back from Mozambique. So now I am truly living a unplanned life.

The kids have been amazing, and it makes it easy for me. Yes, we smile. Yes, we still play. And we have so many awkward moments now.

I spoke to my one brother. Him: "Hi, How are you?"; Me: "Great and you.. *pause*", Slap my head and the tears start.. We end the conversation with him saying "Have a great day too", after I said the same to him (he was going to Robben Island). But that is what I need. That is what I do as well. I say the wrong things at the wrong times. And it is OK. I still want normal.

The kids run up to everyone and in the second sentence after meeting them, they look at me and ask if it is OK for them to tell the person their dad is dead. I nod, it is good for them to talk about. If it means some awkwardness for the other person, so be it. They need to accept it and talk about it. I'm all for social good manners, but also all for open communication.

We feel so blessed this last week. I always knew I had awesome friends, great family and great support, but even I was truly surprised at the amount.

For now we wait. And miss. Be warned, or just informed, I don't plan to blog too much on this subject. I have overwhelming support in real life. But it will filter through in some posts..

Thank you even for the online support of random strangers. I feel truly blessed.

A quote I have lived my last four years by,and will look to again:

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life — It goes on. Robert Frost.